He was still texting me after I saw he had a girlfriend, so I didnt even have to initiate the first text. Not sure where to go from here since I did mess up a bit. It sounds kind of counterintuitive, but if you have confidence in that mindset, it actually helps your self esteem over the long run. He told me not long before that he thought she was cute and had a small thing for her..but I didnt think much of it because he made it seem like no big deal, like a passing thing. If you are worried about your ex finding someone better than you, then that issue lies with you most of the time. My ex came back. Check out my books, posts, guides, videoslots of help on my site! and the girl he was txting with, they both had the same profile picture, so what does that mean? Now you're expected to separate yourself from them." And with social media, it's even. My Fianc of 7 years broke up with me just over 3 weeks ago because I betrayed his trust and hurt him badly Since that time I have been trying hard to fix things and although he forgave me, he totally shut off emotionally towards me and told me he wasnt in love with me anymore because of it. Going from there you will need to do the being there method to get your ex to see you are the better option between you and the new girlfriend. I believed him because it wasnt that he only said such things when we were intimate, like hed say things like that in general. Then any relationship you have in the future will likely be better, but what a terrible way to feel all at once powerless, right? Trying to make me feel jealous? Can i get him back? It's just as simple as trusting her to stay with you. I have to admit though, maybe it was because I was so sad, and I just missed how we used to bedeffinetely acted really clingy. Yes it is. I honestly didn't know where to start. 7 Reasons You Will Find Someone Better than Your Ex - Mind Space Cafe He gave me many excuses that he doesnt like me, family issues and its not you its me. Ive been distracting myself in a good way but he still pops into my mind. I thought she would never leave. Do I still have a chance to get back with my exboyfriend? My biggest fear is that it will be too late. To say I am devastated is an understatement. Weve spoken about the 3 layers of confidence on this website before: You can read more about this on our blog. I have people that come back after years now, we're not saying, put your life on hold and do anything like that. will my ex forget about me during no contact? The more you focus on your magnum opus and get closer to achieving it, the more self-confidence you will have as your ex and his new partner will feel insignificant compared to your lifes purpose. The joy and passion you envision for them are made all the crueler by the stark contrast to your own silent bed. But I told my ex about it, and he ended things with me, and told me it was time to move on. Cause if I was, they wouldn't have left me. I see him hanging out with girls, cozy pictures. Because more than anything there was no clarity, and for me whatever happened, at least id get closure. We both agreed that we would still contact each other, but just not sweet anymore. I felt truly fine, and accepted he wanted to be with her and was just trying to catch up like old times. We love each other dearly but know the timing is all off. Best to have a sensible ex recovery plan. If you broke his trust though cheating either emotionally or physically then I suggest that you stay away from other guys while you are trying to get him back. Even if your ex has moved on to someone new, the idea of this entire process is that you become so confident that you no longer care about your ex or this new person at all. Our memory isn't even a 1 to 1 copy of what happens. Stop jumping to conclusions. Was I that bad of a person to deserve that? How was growing up? I told him I wouldnt see other people and didnt care to. They try to stay in your life or seduce and convince you to return. Okay. From our observation, most people eventually end up letting this fear control them. We began hanging out, catching up as friends then he kissed me and I caught feelings again and realized I want him back. Although our break is a bit different as we are still on good terms AND hes paying for my therapy I am very worried hell start dating someone during our month apart and decide to make our break a breakup. He is telling everyone he will find someone better and he will never return. Yes it is. You certainly have a chance. These include fighting, begging for their ex back after a breakup, making a fool of themselves by sending their ex gifts, showing up at their exs doorstep, showing up to their exs work, or trying anything possible to get their exs attention. Yup. This is one of the smartest things to make your ex think that no one is better than you; however, it is not the only thing you need to do. Sure, we can give you tools to tackle your problems, but it is up to you to utilize them. I hadn't thought about it quite like that. Right before the 3 month period he reignited his fling and said he was only EVER giving three months to sort himself out. I really want to stop worrying about this all the time! She had past traumas and it took her almost her whole life to find true love. Worst month, but also the best. Can you tell me more? Once I recognised that and really really tried to remove my own personal perspective I saw that i did trust my partner and love her. I thought of really giving him the space he wanted but why wont he just reply me? So that's great. How Do I Know if My Ex is Using Me? 7 Signs to Look Out For they want space but they keep reaching out! My girlfriend left me after a three-year relationship. The alternate to this is the flight response, where they will run away and ignore their ex. And i always remind him that its not like im going to replace him, i mean duh?! And ofc theres a part of me that still loves him deeply, and wishes it could work someday although reality is telling me otherwise. It turns out to be a disaster. Hes the love of my life. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. So now the breakup has not only left you heartbroken but also made you feel depressed and doubting yourself. In our opinion, if you are worried about your ex finding someone new/better than you, the issue lies with your self-confidence. I'm really having a hard time because she's the best girl I've ever known. You can scroll through our website or YouTube channel to learn more about the being there method, but it is basically an end-game plan for when your ex has indeed moved on to someone else. Today we're going to talk about, I'm scared my ex will find someone better than me while I'm in no contact. One of the best ways to overcome the pain and suffering youre feeling because of this breakup or your ex finding someone better than you is by tackling things outside your relationship. Mental Health Creepy Catalog Romance For Anyone Who Is Afraid To Let Go Because They Think They'll Never Find Someone Better By Brianna Wiest Updated June 30, 2021 Drew Collins If you're afraid of letting go, it's probably not because you're really that in love with whatever you're holding on to. But he is telling my friends he was never happy in our long term relationship. We even already have plans for our future together. The Complete Guide For Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back, The No Contact Rule (The Definitive Guide), What Your Ex Boyfriend Says Vs. What He Really Means, Heres Exactly What Hes Thinking During The No Contact Rule, What To Do If Your Ex Boyfriend Blocks You, Talking To A Psychologist About Your Exes Body Language. Welcome to another breakup advice video, in today's video I talk about anxiety regarding your ex finding someone better than you & "upgrading" from you. In a day and age like today, where we are used to instant results like exemplified by Google Maps finding your way to an unknown location in an instant, we become irritated when those patterns dont repeat in our relationships. But does this seem like something that should be worth my time? If you're worried about X doing specific things (ie, dating elsewhere, gone off the rails) Just because X is doing Y doesn't mean X is doing Z. We know this piece was a more complicated one; however, the simple crux is that when you learn to control your mind and master control over it, then not only will these processes be easier, but you will be much more confident in yourself. However, I started to notice that sometimes he would just not be there for me. Between a job and uni he wouldnt have time for us. Think of this as your legacy something you want to be remembered for. Then, he broke up wif me cuz of tht. What you store is the interpretation and how it made you feel. Because either she's going to come back or you're going to find somebody that's a better fit for you and you don't want to mess up. Is that focusing on the changing and what he can control. And before you say anything, yes, I am working on ME in the meantime. We, we unconsciously it's not taking take on those patterns and behaviors and sometimes we're like, wait, did, did my father just come in the room? why exes dont come back if youre waiting for them, why you cant stop thinking about your ex and what to do, things are not progressing with my breakup, what to do when a no contact period ends and your ex still doesnt want to talk. All rights reserved. You can do many things to show your ex that there is no one better than you, but going back to the holy trinity of Health, Wealth, and Relationships should be your go-to mechanism. Now I feel like I reacted too fast and am not sure if I should text him and say we could try being friends again, or if I should do another few days of no contact. I cnfronted him, he got angry and told me I was always up his ass. I love him. This should be your starting point at conquering the power of fear. What's Really Going on When People Stay in Touch With Exes This takes the effort away from the other two aspects, and your health and wealth are neglected. And oftentimes, you know, that person loves you and cares about you enough to where they, once they have time to reflect on things and really process things that they can think, well, I know he wasn't perfect, but I do miss him. September 17, 2021 by Zan Finding out that your ex got back into the dating scene can be shocking and worrying. I got tired so I started seeing other people and that startled and annoyed him. Margaret ( 01:06 ): I hadn't thought about it quite like that. What's perfect is your memory of her not her. I have broken up with my boyfriend we have been together for five years but now he told me he found someone better than me who do the things I havent done for him, I dont known what to do anymore because I love him I dont want to love anyone else.
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